Photo by permanently scatterbrained/eric molina via Flickr Creative Commons
Let's review what we know.
The McRib has no ribs. It's barbecue sauced pork that's formed to look like bones, but is essentially a sandwich patty. That is part of its globular mythos.
It has a cult following. It has a cult anti-following. It's been called a ninja sandwich. It's been called a sad pig/gym mat sandwich. We can also deduce that it's not a polar bear, since that's not something the marketing team is really into.
Now, because it's a makebelive nightmare fantasy food, real-world alternatives are a bit more challenging. For the most part barbecue seekers are forced to face the tangy facts: There is no such thing as a bone sandwich.
To ingest the real-deal in a reality-based shape means sometimes making the tough choice between BBQ pork ribs and pulled pork. You simply can't have your bones and eat them too.
Photo by Adam Kuban via Flickr Creative Commons
McDonald's is planning to ban from its burger recipe a controversial filler known as "pink slime."
Considered safe by the Department of Agriculture, the practice has received a McFlurry of recent media attention thanks in part to a documentary and campaign led by celebrity chef Jamie Oliver.
The fast food restaurant chain, with approximately 800 locations in Southern California, said the decision to dump the slime was not based on public criticism.
Perhaps it was the goo's potential for psychoreactive sass in response to human emotional states that influenced the stoppage.