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A girl looks at a plastic shark on a playground in Destin, Florida.

Being threatened by a shark? Just punch it in the nose, right?

Snake-bit? Suck that venom out.

Caught in a lightening storm? Lay down flat on the ground.

All conventional solutions to some summer problems. And all wrong, according to writer and humorist Cole Gamble. He offers some alternatives that might help you survive the summer. Intact.